The Field Where I Could Breathe: What childhood clutter taught me about ADHD, digital overwhelm, and finding space to breathe
- Megs Crawford
- Jul 6
- 3 min read

When I was a kid, I felt overwhelmed in my home.
We had moved into my grandfather's house (which still smells like him to this day), and all our stuff came with us.
Everything was piled on top of everything else.
Nothing ever cleared out, just added to.
Whenever I felt like I couldn't take it anymore, I would go outside.
A field and a way out from the sensory overload
We had 17 acres of land. My parents sometimes rented it to hunters or kept cows or horses. I loved pretending I was a "farm girl," even if that title was just in my head.
At the top of the upper field, along a line of trees, there was a hidden trail that connected to the Appalachian Trail.
That was my secret escape.
That's where I went to "run away from home." Sometimes I'd just stand there and sing at the top of my lungs.
Imaginary sleeves and real dirt
I would imagine I was Laura Ingalls Wilder or Anne of Green Gables, twirling in puffed sleeves, though usually I was wearing a Tasmanian Devil T-shirt.
I had dreams of performing.
Of seeing the world. And I loved being in nature more than anything else.
When there was nowhere to rest inside
What I remember most about that time is this:
When I felt uncomfortable inside the house, I went outside.
There was nowhere in that house that brought peace. Not from the childhood clutter, not from the chaos, and definitely not from the nonstop swirl of my ADHD brain.
Fast forward to today… and the clutter still finds me.
But now, it's not just the stuff.
I'm a mom.
A wife.
I work full-time.
And life is full of digital clutter too.
Technology, notifications, information, expectations.
I can't even keep track of what I'm behind on.
Where did the pause go
As a kid, there was space to pause. Quiet found me.
Now I don't even remember to take a deep breath.
For the longest time, I was waiting for that pause to magically appear.
Waiting until there was enough time to finally get my home organized.
Enough time to sort the photos.
Enough time to go through my emails.
Enough time to catch up.
But that time never came.
Forever making this moment (& ADHD) mine
And here's what I finally realized: I have to make that time. I have to slow my life down on purpose. If I don't, it will just keep speeding by without me in it.
So even with a Ferrari brain and the constant push to go faster, I'm choosing something else.
I'm choosing to pause.
To walk up that imaginary field in my mind, stand under the trees, and sing for no one but me. Because the world will keep spinning. But this moment? This moment is mine.
Megs is the creator of the Organizing an ADHD Brain Podcast, where she helps women with ADHD and other neurodivergent folks declutter their homes and routines without shame. Her work is rooted in lived experience, gentle honesty, and the belief that small steps count. She’s here for the real-life version of organizing—the one that makes room for joy, rest, and a little bit of chaos. Want to work with Megs? Learn more about the many ways to connect and find the right fit for where you are in your organizing journey.
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